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I would like to introduce my upcoming workshops focused on preteen and teen girls and explain my motivation for designing this series.  My name is Stephanie Lowe-Sagebiel, LCSW and I have 17 years of social work experience within the Indianapolis community. Nearly half of those years have been spent in direct clinical practice.  I have never felt more passionate and concerned about what it means to be a young girl in our community than I feel now.  Girls today have to navigate their natural physical, emotional and social development all while managing an array of social media, technology and intense academic and sports expectations.  These phenomena have left them little time or ability to fully process and problem solve some of life’s most challenging issues.

In her book, Adolescent Girls in Crisis, Martha B. Straus states that “preteen and teen girls today are feeling unsafe, unknown and unloved.  Their experience isn’t like anything we can imagine from our own teen years; the risks are far greater than ever before.”  Her words validate the experiences I have witnessed in the growing number of preteen and teenage girls I have seen in my practice over the past several years.

It is my hope that this new workshop series will give girls the space to develop new skills, and the time to gain a better understanding of the current adolescent landscape.  I look forward to offering this “In Between” experience in a fun, creative, and safe environment.  Please view the brochure below and share with anyone you feel my benefit from this summer series.  Also, feel free to contact me with any questions you may have via email, SLoweSagebiel@CenterPointCounseling.org or phone, 317-252-5518 ext 2.

In Between- brochure

You betcha!  ‘Tis the season and particularly for college students!  So, a part of this care package is some quick exercises to support your wellness!

 Don’t have time to put on the sneakers and hit the gym?   I encourage you to try breathing and meditation! 

 It can be a quick exercise to help center oneself back to a place of serenity when feeling overwhelmed. 

 

I encourage you to try the Breathing Exercise and Guided Meditation listed below to support your intention to do well in your classes with a calm and creative brain.  These sites and links are available at your College website @ Second.  Use the QR code at the right for the link.

 

Breathing Exercise:

          http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r82UgmWReYs

Guided Meditation 10 Minutes:

          http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j8n-XP1zLGI

Additional Web Resources:

          http://marc.ucla.edu/

          http://brown.edu/Student_Services/Health_Services/Health_Education/common_college_health_issues/mindfulness.php

Phone Apps:

          http://www.mindbodygreen.com/0-135/3-Great-Guided-Meditation-iPhone-Apps.html

          http://www.letpanicgo.com/

          http://itunes.apple.com/us/app/simply-being-guided-meditation/id347418999?mt=8

 

Shortly after graduating from college, I was introduced to these practice(s) and found it to be supportive in my life and relationships.  I have also found counseling to be supportive as well and now that is what I do for a living.  Should you ever want to talk to someone during the Holidays to learn about various ways to manage stress and your life filled relationships, please feel free to give me a call.  CenterPoint Counseling can be there for you to help you navigate the trials and tribulations of life.

Peace to you during stressful times,

P. Scott Sweet, LCSW, LCAC, MSW
CenterPoint Counseling
7700 North Meridian Street
Indianapolis, IN  46260
317.252.5518 office
317.259.5718 fax
ssweet@centerpointcounseling.org

Written by:  Dr. David Chaddock

The holiday season has come again.  This is a time of joy and celebration.  It’s a time when we renew our hopes and dreams about our relationships and future.  But too often, the holiday season is also a time of greater stress, loneliness and grief.  Roughly 80% of respondents in a recent poll described this time of year as “mostly” or “very” stressful.  Unfortunately, the stress of the season often makes it difficult to truly celebrate the season or focus on the Love of God, as expressed through the birth of Jesus.

As we begin this holiday season, let us remember these tips so we can pursue the deeper meaning of Christ’s presence in our lives.

 Tips for the Holidays

1. Focus Your Commitments:  Most of us live very busy lives and the holidays can double the number of items on our “To Do” list.  Before the season even starts, try to identify the activities and events you want to complete or attend and make your plans.  With these important items planned, you may feel freer to say “yes” or “no” to other opportunities, based on your commitments.  When you schedule the commitments that are most important to you, the holiday season seems more manageable and meaningful.

2. Keep Things Simple:  The holidays are sometimes described as “too much of a good thing.”  Too often, the holidays become a time when we feel frazzled, stressed and overwhelmed.  We become worn out by trying to do too much.  Whenever possible, try to limit the shopping, parties, cards and gifts and focus on a simpler holiday, with more time for relating to loved ones and reflection. 

3. Don’t Go to Excess:  The holiday season can be a time of excess.  Too often, we eat too much, drink too much and spend too much.  All three of these can lead to problems in the coming year.  The holidays were never intended to be a season resulting in weight gain, memories of embarrassing behaviors or more bills to pay.  Try to limit your excesses and not consume too much this year. 

4. Be Wise with Your Relationships:  The holidays are a time when we think about our relationships.  Sometimes we are concerned about spending time with friends and family, especially when there have been problems in the past.  Sometimes, the holidays cause us to remember those who are no longer in our lives due to death, divorce or distance.  Sometimes we are anxious about simply being out of our normal relational routines.  If you feel there is “too much togetherness” with family and friends, find ways to get some space.  Take a walk, a nap or make a Starbuck’s run.  If you feel like there’s “not enough togetherness”, look for ways to get involved with others.  Volunteer at church, in the community or help out with planning the company party.  When we help others, especially during the holidays, we often discover our own loneliness is relieved.

5. Ask for Help:  You may find the holiday season especially hard this year.  Perhaps it’s been a difficult year because of work, a death or conflict with your family.  Perhaps the holidays just bring up too many painful memories.  Whatever the reason, know that help is available.  Contact the Pastoral Care office at 253-6461 or CenterPoint Counseling at 252-5518, if you want to talk with someone.  The holiday season is a great time to ask for help.

Try to remember that the holidays are a time to renew and deepen our faith in Jesus.  As we remember the coming of the Christ Child, we can celebrate the love of God and experience the joy that comes through this Season of Hope.

     We all like to be at our best and to do that, you’ve got to take care of your brain. And now science is showing us how.

     We used to think that the brain was fixed at about age 5 – and that it was downhill from there. But recently, some pioneering work in neurobiology has turned that thinking right on it’s head. Scientists are now finding that we have the capacity to re-wire brain circuits and to grow new neurons.

     It’s known as neuroplasticity – the brain’s ability to be flexible and to rewire in response to experience.

     And ever since neuroscientists discovered neuroplasticity and also neurogenesis (the brain’s ability to grow new neural networks), practitioners have sought to bring these new findings to their patients.

     So that’s what you have here, a snapshot of 10 things you can do to take care of your brain. And the news gets even better: They work!

1. Aerobic exercise is one of the best things you can do for your brain. At any age! Why? Because Aerobic exercise increases BDNF, which stands for brain-derived neurotrophic factor. When BDNF is released into the system, brain growth and neural connections are enhanced. John Ratey calls it “miracle grow” for the brain. So, go out and get moving (and that doesn’t mean you have to run a marathon). If exercise is new to you, then start by walking, dancing, or even swimming, short distances at first, building-up your stamina over a month’s time. And parents – get your kids to turn off the TV, the internet and the video games, and go outside and play. And if you are a manager or work in an office, suggest that the staff take a walk during lunch, or lead them in some jumping jacks before a meeting or a brain storming session.

2. Weight training not only builds muscles and contributes to bone health, but it also improves cognitive functioning, such as decision-making, resolving conflict, and improving focus.

3. The hippocampus, a part of the brain in charge of long term memory and spatial navigation, plays a huge role in learning – so anything we can do to support the hippocampus can be helpful. But the corollary is also true – it’s important to avoid anything that makes the hippocampus shrink. More about this later.

4. The amygdala, the area of your brain that’s involved in processing emotional events, has been trained to be on the alert for danger. Evolution has hard-wired us this way for survival, but this hyper-alert state can be very harmful – it affects our blood pressure and our interpersonal relationships. But it also affects our brains.

5. Meditation, often undertaken as a calming practice, has been shown to quiet the amygdala and activate the hippocampus. Remember, anything that supports the hippocampus is good for you.

6. The cerebral cortex, which is involved in memory, perception, awareness and thought begins to thin with age. But researchers are finding that mindfulness meditation practice can thicken cell walls in the brain.

7. Too much stress can be harmful, not just to the cardiovascular system, but also to your brain. Recent studies are showing that when corticosteroids (the stress hormone) were increased, neurogenesis (brain growth) decreased. Corticosteroids are hormones released from the adrenals in response to stress. So, when stress went up, brain growth, or what’s known as neurogenesis, went down.  In fact, chronic stress can shrink the brain making it hard to learn new information or to even simply retain the information you already have.

8. You need to find the sweet spot for neuroplasticity. New learning is most likely to take place when the brain has an optimal amount of arousal. Too much arousal, and the brain shuts down; not enough and it gets distracted and lazy. For teachers, parents, and managers, this is especially useful information.

9. There is a harmful side of neuroplasticity. We normally think of the possibility of brain growth and change as a positive thing, but there can also be a dark side to neuroplasticity. When you are experiencing trauma, you are also in learning mode. But this time, your brain is laying down neural connections that include vivid memories and sensations of terrifying experiences. That’s why it’s important to deal with trauma with a trained professional as soon as possible.

10. We all have the capacity to change our brains. Neuroplasticity makes it possible. So, begin with these tips and get started today. 

 Copyright © 2011 by Ruth M Buczynski, PhD, Licensed Psychologist

The National Institute for the Clinical Application of Behavioral Medicine

www.nicabm.com

          Life is full of challenging questions.  One of the most soul-wrenching questions is whether you should stay in your struggling marriage (relationship) or not.  This decision impacts every aspect of your life.  With so much on the line, this decision is difficult and overwhelming.  Many women ask themselves, “What happened to my marriage and can it be saved?”

          Two key ingredients for any successful relationship are a sense of “connection” and “care-giving”, which we all desire.  Early in a relationship, we enjoy a fun connection and would do anything to help each other.  Kindness and affection flows easily. 

          As the relationship becomes more established, our attention broadens to other interests, such as careers, children, friends, family, and volunteering.  While these interests are great, they sometimes threaten our relationship and the sense of connection we share.  Now our care-giving is offered to all these other interests instead.  By the end of the day, there’s not much energy left for connecting and caring for one another.  After weeks, months and years of being focused elsewhere, your connection has withered and both of you feel hurt and neglected, but you no longer turn to each other for care-giving.  You get your needs met through work, children, family and friends and begin to criticize each other for not caring enough.  What was once a great relationship has become the source of your frustration, hurt, and sadness.  At this point, you begin to wonder whether you should stay or go.

          The “divorce assumption” in our culture suggests a person struggling in their marriage only has two options.  They can stay married and be unhappy or get a divorce in the hopes of finding happier days.  However, a study from the University of Chicago challenges this assumption.  In her study, Sociologist Linda Waite discovered that 80% of the unhappily married couples on the verge of divorce reported being happily married five years later, if they stayed together and worked on their connection.  Unfortunately, those who pursued divorce reported the same level of unhappiness as before they divorced.  Waite concludes that they traded one type of stress and frustration for another and now struggle with lower self-esteem, conflict with children and their ex-spouse, less financial stability, and a sense that their life is fragmented.

          So what should you do before you decide to go…

          1)    Most women over 40 have spent many years caring for children, careers and families and need to re-evaluate their own wants and needs.  Take time for yourself to clarify your hopes and dreams by journaling, try yoga or talking with a trusted friend or spiritual leader.

          2)   Look for new, small ways to invite your spouse into re-connection.  Take short walks together after dinner; go on coffee dates often; or meet for lunch every few weeks.

          3)   Create a new relationship vision or dream.  Don’t discuss your dissatisfaction through criticism, but instead share what each of you would like “more of” in your relationship.

          4)   Consider working with a coach or therapist that can help you discover new ways of connecting and caring.  With a little help, you might be one of those couples that report being happily married five years from now.

          To stay or go is a big decision.  Whether you just started asking this question or have considered it for awhile, it can get better.  Don’t give up too soon.

by: David Chaddock

Welcome to the Christmas and New Year’s Season!  The Holiday Season can be a time of hope and joy, but for many, the holidays are a time of stress, loneliness and grief.  A recent study found that 80% of respondents described the holidays as “mostly” or “very” stressful.  As we start the Holidays, it may help to follow these tips so we can focus on Christ’s presence in our lives this Season.

How can we manage this Holiday Stress?

• Doing Too Much – As the saying goes, “All things in moderation.”  One problem in the holiday season is that it’s too much of a good thing.  Too much of anything leaves us feeling overwhelmed, frazzled and worn out.  Try to limit the shopping, parties, cards, and gifts and focus on simplicity.
• Eating, Drinking and Spending Too Much – It’s fun to eat, drink, and be merry, but not to “excess”.  The temptation to over eat, drink and spend can lead to weight gain, memories of embarrassing behaviors, and debt.  These problems can linger long beyond this Holiday Season.  Be mindful this year about not consuming too much.
• Too Much Togetherness – The holidays can be a fun time when we gather with extended family.  While this can be a wonderful thing, anything that moves us out of our normal routines adds stress to our lives.  With our families, we sometimes fall back into “old family roles” or just lose some of our privacy which can be stressful.  Try to keep regular routines and schedule time apart, while still enjoying time together.  Take a walk if you need some space from the family gathering.
• Not Enough Togetherness -  Sometimes we can feel really alone and isolated when it seems the rest of the world is gathering for gala events and parties.  Whether we are away from family or have lost a love one, try to find ways to connect with others.  Volunteer at church or in the community.  Helping others will help relieve some of the loneliness we may feel.
• Finding Help When the Stress is Too High – You may find the Holiday Season especially difficult for one reason or another.  Perhaps you are grieving a loved one, or time with your family was upsetting, or this season carries painful memories.  Know that help is available.  Contact the Pastoral Care office at 253-6461or call CenterPoint Counseling at 252-5518 to schedule time with one of our counselors.

Try to stay focused on the Reason for the Season and watch for the coming of the Christ Child in a new way this year.  Calming your mind and meditating on Jesus’ birth may be the best way to add meaning and perspective to your holiday celebrations this year.

by Sandy Berry

Thank goodness, Spring is here.  The air is fresh, we are able to go outside and play, and the sun actually exists!  It is a time of renewal.  So copy Spring and renew the energy in your love relationship!

One way to increase the energy in your relationship is to do something fun together.  Usually each person has their own idea of fun (which doesn’t always match their partner’s idea).  Ask your partner to do your fun this week, and then you will do their fun next week.  Take the time to have fun, play and laugh together.  And like Spring, it will brighten your relationship.

by Scott Sweet

Addiction or chemical dependence can be defined by having psychological or physical need for something that can not be controlled.  This can lead to a number of negative consequences on relationships, education, finances, health and emotional growth.  Read the rest of this entry »

by Sandy Berry

Many of us learned how to treat others when we were children practicing the Golden Rule:  Do Unto Others As You Would Have Done Unto You.  It is a great standard.   Here is another great idea; it is the Platinum Rule that you can add to your standard rules that enhance your relationships.

The Platinum Rule states:  Do Unto Others As They Want You To Do Unto Them.

Every person has a unique way to see the world, and we would fair better in relationship if we learn what our partner wants or needs.  Would they prefer an act of service, a gift, words of affirmation, time spent together, or physical touch (suggestions from Gary Chapman’s book, The Five Love languages).

Many times we give them what we think they would like or what we ourselves would like and assume they are like us.  Becoming observant to what people say they want, and to be curious about them, will help ensure that the loving gesture you desire to give them has the positive impact you intend.

by Sandy Berry

Imago Relationship Therapy is a theory that believes couples choose each other so that each person can grown into their full aliveness – full aliveness is that wonderful feeling you felt in the beginning of your relationship.  At some point in relationship, feeling fully alive begins to fade.  We find our relationship to be a place of conflict and lost hope.    Imago believes that this phase of all love relationships is a normal.  Our culture tells us to leave if a relationship gets too difficult.  But don’t leave!  Imago theory believes that the conflict in your relationship is an indicator that you are with the perfect person to help you grow into your full aliveness permanently.  In other words, conflict is a natural part of any relationship and is personal growth trying to happen.  It is through your own personal growth that you achieve your full aliveness.

In Imago Therapy, you are taught tools that help you and your partner understand the purpose of relationship.  It focuses on the connection between you and our partner, how you interrupt your connection and how to restore your connection.  It may be that communication gets distorted or arguments begin around differing beliefs about what to spend money on, how to raise the children, or who does the most work around the house.  There are many ways couples disconnect.  Imago relationship therapy is a way to understand these differences and how to resolve the conflict.